They say: “Live in NYC once, but leave before it makes you hard….”. During my 9 years in NYC, I noticed how difficult and lonely this city can be especially for single girls. All my friends were beautiful, smart and yet they were all single. Most friends who moved out of NY, got married within a year. Then I slowly started to realize why NYC was such a difficult place for girls to be in a relationship. Dating in New York is extremely tough for a girl for the following six reasons:
Dating in NYC
- The ratio of girls to guys is skewed
There are about 3 girls to every guy in NYC, therefore, if you are a girl, you will have to fight for the guys. Girls in NY do fight for their men. It happened to me so many times that I was at a bar with a good looking guy and a girl walked up to him even though I was there. These girls completely ignore the fact that the guy is with another girl. They simply don’t care. They like a guy and they go for him. If you are not so assertive, you have no chance of getting or keeping a guy. There are an insane amount of women seeking men in NY.dating in New York
- NYC has the ultimate hook-up culture
In this city, people work hard and play even harder. Many people go out every night and they enjoy a drink or two. After a couple of drinks, people tend to hook up. This phenomenon happens everywhere in the World, because people are people, however in NY, I saw guys and girls doing this all the time, some even do this multiple times a week. Therefore, guys have no incentive to find a girl and establish a relationship with her, as it is much more fun for most of them to be out there hunting all the time. Dating in New York City can be a difficult game as everyone has so many options. If you are wondering what are the best places to meet singles in NYC? Just walk into any bars and you will meet them. Eeryone is single, so they are all over the place. dating in New York
- The city is full of short average looking men
A friend of mine calls them “toxic bachelors”. The truth is, most guys in NY are slightly shorter than European guys. Guys don’t have the incentive to look good or dress well, because there are so many hot women, they can get a different girl anytime they want, even if they are short and overweight. Therefore they are way too spoiled and lazy to make any effort. The New York dating scene is unique in a way, because everyone is always single and everyone wants to hook up.
dating in New York
- The city is full of gorgeous educated women
Guys are super spoiled, because they can pick and choose from some of the most beautiful and successful women in the country. In NY everybody goes to the gym, single women in NYC are well dressed. Most of them are highly educated and work hard. The competition for women is fierce. There are so many single women in New York everywhere, like in no other city. When I lived in NY, I saw all these gorgeous and successful women around me unable to find boyfriends. Guys have way too many choices and no incentive to settle down. Many girls ask me where to meet single men in NYC? They are everywhere, but most of them are toxic bachelors.
dating in New York
- Overly superficial city
NYC is one of the most superficial cities in the World. It competes with LA in this respect. Every single time a guy walked up to me at a party, they would ask me what I was doing for living (to check how well off I was), where I lived (again to check if I can afford to live in a fancy neighborhood), who I knew at the party (check how connected I was). Sometimes, they even asked me where I went to college. Most people can figure out my social standing from these questions and decide based on that if they want to continue the conversation with me or they would just walk away. I was so tired of hearing these questions over and over again, that I kept telling people that I was changing light bulbs in the traffic lights for a living. Guys looked at me in disbelief. It was hilarious. Most of them did not know what to say. They also questioned how I could afford to live in the neighborhood I was living in at the time from doing such a low paid work. It fascinated me the conversations I had with people on what it is like to change light bulbs in traffic lights. It was much more interesting than talking about what it’s like to work for an investment bank. I also had friends who would introduce me to people like: She is Barbara, she works for XYZ investment bank. I really did not want to be associated with XYZ investment bank on a Saturday night at a party, so I never wanted to be introduced this way. However, guys were fascinated by the fact that a tall blond works for an investment bank and their eyes lit up and suddenly they started talking to me about derivatives trading. It was really the last thing I wanted to talk about on a Saturday night. A few guys even asked me whether I was a secretary at the bank. I guess I looked too dumb to be doing a finance job in their eyes. So finding love in NYC can be a real challenge.
dating in New York
- NYC is the ultimate playground for men
It is indeed the best breeding ground for men who just want to have fun every night. The never ending supply of young and successful women makes the city the ideal hunting ground for all the sharks who never get tired of the game. They come in all different ages. The best nightclubs are full of divorced guys in their fifties. Most young guys cannot afford to drop thousands of dollars on a bottle service at places like Provocateur, therefore, you end up seeing middle aged men everywhere. They think and act as if they were still 25 and they party like there is no tomorrow, chasing after girls in their twenties. It is a somewhat pathetic scene, but it can be rather amusing to watch from outside. So, dating in NYC is hard, but you should still enjoy the ride. Dating a New York man needs special skills. They tend to stray away easily.
dating in New York
NYC is a very tough place to date for girls. My advise to all my female friends who are still in NY is to pack their stuff and move to Chicago or San Francisco, where the ratio of men and women is much better. Dating in San Francisco or dating in Los Angeles can be a much easier task. Men are better looking and less spoiled. I also think London is a pretty good place for dating, with plenty of men from all over the World. European men are tall, attractive, well-dressed, well mannered. So, it is a good option for anyone who wants a climate change and had enough of the game.
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